So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
