Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize