Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
