I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
