absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
