there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize