One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize