I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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