Your tits are I can't wait for
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
