thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You need Xanax blowdarts
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
