She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
