when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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