all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize