i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize