Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.