she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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