Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
