If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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