Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
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