No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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