Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
