I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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