So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
