New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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