How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
