Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
tonight lets celebrate not being married
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
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