just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
