Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
