Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
third nipple confirmed
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
