he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
