Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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