It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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