got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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