dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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