id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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