You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Randomize
