I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
