it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
