Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Randomize
