I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Randomize
