...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
