well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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