he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
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