i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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