yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
