I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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