May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize