before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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