Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
