I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize
