I'm gonna have a badass scar
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
