She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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